My oldest child, Ellie, is a strong-willed, leader. She is so much like her daddy, and at times so much like me when I was little. She loves to take care of people, which is I believe could be one of her spiritual gifts. Ever since she was a toddler, she was taking care of her baby dolls. I know Owen thinks of her as a second mommy, because she is so motherly with him. I am so thankful for my sweet Ellie, and I wanted to document this story so I never forget it. The morning started out like most, filling bowls of cereal, changing clothes, cleaning up spilt chocolate milk, starting a load of laundry, getting backpacks together, finding socks to wear, brushing teeth, cleaning up another milk spill, etc. You get my point, right? The mornings are rarely peaceful times around our home, and usually Ellie is a morning person, but this particular morning she was very cranky. Let me repeat, VERY CRANKY.
She couldn't decide what to wear to school, which set her back with fixing her hair. When it was time to fix her hair, she wanted it curled, but I told her we did not have time since she took so long getting dressed. This all escalates to tears and screaming. A lovely way to start the day, right? My blood pressure rises easily with Ellie. I don't know what it is, but my fuse is short with her often. It's something I pray about regularly. I'm not proud of it, and on this morning especially, God used her to humble me. Keep reading. Everything continued to be a struggle that morning. Her hair would not cooperate, then she couldn't decide what she wanted to eat for breakfast. This all just eats up the time before we have to head to the bus stop. You've been here, right? If you have kids, you know these mornings. They often happen on Sundays. Ha. Now your with me.
We somehow managed to make it out the back door with everything she needed for school. She buckled Owen in the stroller, and the twins got on their bikes. We were ready for the trek to the bus stop. I was feeling some relief, knowing we were on our way, and that she had made it out the door without tears.
As we started walking, Ellie said, "Mom, I'm sorry for the way I acted this morning. Will you forgive me?" I'm not sure my brain registered what she said right away. I was a little taken aback. She asked me to forgive her? My little girl, was seeking forgiveness. Right away I accepted her apology and proceeded to ask her to forgive me for being short with her, and losing my temper. Moments like these are great ways to teach my kids about the Gospel and grace. I did my best to remind her that we are not perfect, and Christ died for us, being the sinful people we are. I did my best, trying to remember some of the things I read in, Give Them Grace. (A great, great book about disciplining with grace in mind, not just moralistic parenting. I highly recommend it.)
I don't want to ever forget that morning. It was humbling. I should have been the one apologizing first. I'm the adult, right? We continued talking, and I confessed to her that I do not apologize like I should. I told her I struggle with pride, and she said, "Yeah, Daddy apologizes more than you do." Those words pierced me. I know they are true, and confessing my wrongs to those around me is hard to do. It comes easier for Tom, and he has taught me so much about seeking forgiveness. I am so grateful that my kids have a Daddy that teaches them how to seek forgiveness, and demonstrates that openly with me and them.
I tell this story, like I said, so I will never forget it. I am so thankful to God for my children, and the blessing they are to my life, especially mornings like this one in particular. I get so excited seeing God at work in the lives of my kids. I also love how he uses them to teach me. Weird, right? Seems backwards, but God knew I needed the humbling from my pride. I am so thankful for Christ, and his redeeming blood. He made a way for me. Thank you, Lord.
Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. -Ephesians 4:32
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